The Lost Coffee Verses of Genesis
Thirsty for Truth? Discover the Divine Origin of Your Daily Grind in "The Lost Coffee Verses of Genesis"!
Are you ready to awaken your soul, one meticulously crafted cup at a time? For centuries, humanity has been denied a crucial piece of scripture: the divinely inspired account of coffee's creation and its role in our very existence. Now, the veil is lifted, and the sacred Coffeesis can finally be revealed!
Within these hallowed pages, you will uncover:
The True Story of Creation: Witness how God, in His infinite wisdom, brought forth the Coffea plant on the eighth day, and understand the critical purpose it serves in His grand design.
Eve Bean, the First Barista: Learn of the Redwood rib from which she was crafted, and the sacred task entrusted to her: to unlock the bean's secrets and gift humanity with the perfect brew.
The Frappuccino Heresy: Tremble at the tale of the serpent's cunning and the Forbidden Frappuccino's tempting deceit, a chilling parable of the dangers of straying from pure, unadulterated coffee bliss.
The Wisdom of the Bean Weavers: Follow the rise of the enlightened Order dedicated to preserving the art of brewing and rescuing souls from the sugary abyss.
The Caffeine Commandments: Abide by these sacred laws and unlock a life of caffeinated righteousness, avoiding the pitfalls of weak brews, decaf blasphemy, and unforgivable coffee spills!
"Coffeesis" is more than just a book; it's a transformative experience. Prepare to:
Laugh: Delight in the witty and reverent humor that elevates the everyday ritual of coffee to its rightful place in the spiritual realm.
Reflect: Ponder the deeper meaning behind every cup, and appreciate the connection between the bean, the brew, and the divine.
Share: Spread the coffee gospel and enlighten your friends with this newfound understanding of our caffeinated calling.
Don't let another day go by shrouded in the darkness of coffee ignorance! Order your copy of "Coffeesis: The Lost Coffee Verses of Genesis" today and embark on a journey of enlightenment, one delicious sip at a time! Your soul – and your taste buds – will thank you.
This book is bound in a 16th-century pamphlet style.
The paper this book was printed on is 100% cotton rag 118 GSM Flurry Cotton produced by Boxcar Press. The book's cover is crafted from Colorplan Paper's 270 gsm 100# Cover stock with the title hand-pressed in gold foil.
This book was digitally set with Adobe Caslon Pro at BOOKFORGE EDITIONS in historic Erie, Pennsylvania.
The Lost Coffee Verses of Genesis will appear in the short story collection, Lavishly Entangled Words of Enlightenment, written by Edward Patrick Kranz. The compilation will consist of semi-autobiographical fiction and other eloquences of deceit.